As a piece of Art, I value Mad Men as highly as anything else I’ve ever experienced, but did it need to be made? It’s a question that I’ve been struggling with for a while. Some films such as 2001 have a very clear, almost immaculate, message to present to the world. Getting people to think about, and revel in their grandness/importance. However, any new idea I have, I wonder if it has any value within that context. By now this is normal to me. I’m confident in my (mid-level at present) abilities, but I’m driven by my desire to be considered among the best filmmakers of all time, and to make a film I personally consider to be a masterpiece – one that deserves to be part of the canon. Have I done that yet? Not by a long shot.
Last week I had a real crisis of faith. I couldn’t find any reason to continue making films, or more specifically a film spanning ten years, about two friends whose lives take drastically different directions. I like the film we’ve most recently shot (‘MUTE’). It’s a huge step forward visually, and is a break from our former “little films”. We stretched ourselves with a very tight budget, to create a huge, believable world, and everyone involved delivered exceptionally. My only issue with it, is that I didn’t feel as invested in the ideas on a personal level, as I had with either ‘Narcissist’ or ‘Time and Place’.